I am probably going to get stoned for writing this post, but this buzz around caffeine (pun intended) has gone on long enough! Its time for a coffee aficianado (not addict) to take a stand!
I have been a coffee drinker for ages now and I love a good coffee as much as the average Joe (pun intended, again) but I am not going to implode if I dont have 16 cups of coffee a day!
Wherever I go, I am surrounded by frenzied coffee drinkers, who run around like chickens with their heads cut off, if they dont get their shot of espresso. Two relatives of mine actually chant "Give me coffee" in their sleep (I am not kidding!). Recently, I heard two of my colleagues agonizing over the right time for coffee; their conversation went thus:
Nancy-Brew: (sniffing greedily) is that a cup of coffee I smell?
High-on-Java: yes, it is, I am just getting ready for the meeting at nine.
Nancy-Brew: Oh my god, I completely forgot about the meeting! I need that life-giving brew, I need it now!
High-on-Java: Well, go get one then, I got an extra large because I heard the HR manager is going to make a presentation today...
Nancy-Brew: But if I get one now, then I will need to get another one around eleven which is my coffee break and I can't afford 2 coffees, they are so expensive...
High-on-Java: (very reasonably)So have a breakroom coffee today.. (not realising she just lit a fuse)
Nancy-Brew: Breakroom Coffee??? What the @%&^&( ??!, wash your mouth, you @$%#^%$&!
(The impending meeting is forgotten as the Caffeine Hillbillies get into a catfight..)
I don't blame the coffee for this ridiculous obsession.. I blame the drinkers...
There are all sorts of associations for other addictions.. why not for coffee?
I think, most people are obsessed with coffee because of what it stands for - worldly sophistication and toughness...
Tea, on the other hand, is mostly associated with fastidiousness and elitism...
After seeing the headless chicken dance & hairpulling catfights of Cruggies (drug addicts = druggies, coffee addicts = cruggies), I think a little more priss and a little less buzz is on order for this crazy caffeinated world!
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well as an avid coffee fan/addict i agree with you!! As much as i depend on my first cup of coffee to help me kickstart my day, this obsession with breathing your every breath with a cuppa Joe in ur hand is pissing off. More so,the coffee is a mug full of murky water or what appears to be the remanants of the filter coffee decoction, which people drink oh so obsessively.. there are very few people who can tell the difference between good and bad coffee... might as well swirl in a dash of caffeine into milk/water all day instead of calling it coffee. True coffee lovers such as me ( i hate to blow my own horn, but yet again i am forced to :)so excuse me my dearest) can tell you if my grouchy mood today morning is cause of lousy instant coffee or if I owe my cheery presence to the froathy and 'Super' Narasus filter kaapi :)
ReplyDeleteLOL! Very amusing indeed! Keep 'em coming, Kooky! I wonder if the "Caffeine Hillbillies' read your blog... :D
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